This Friday, I’m going to do it. It's a long time coming, but I avoided the inevitable long enough. I’ve been dealing with uterine fibroids for about 10 years and I’ve decided to stop letting them affect my quality of life once and for all. So, I'm going ahead with a hysterectomy.
I was bleeding to death, literally, when I was diagnosed with fibroids a decade ago. I was menstruating heavily and non-stop for weeks and became super anemic. When I saw the gynecologist about this, I was admitted immediately into the hospital to get iron pumped back into me daily for two weeks. As soon as my red blood cell count was back to normal, I underwent an abdominal myomectomy to remove these benign lumps. I have a nice five-inch scar along my bikini line as a souvenir.
Fibroids are common among women in their 30s and 40s, and they can’t even compare to cancer and other life-threatening diseases. Nevertheless, I hoped that would be the first and last time I’d deal with them, even though I knew the chances of them returning were high. Two years ago, they indeed came back and I opted for uterine fibroid embolization, a less invasive procedure to shrink and kill them altogether. Unfortunately, it wasn’t successful and I am where I am today.
When I told my dad about the hysterectomy, he asked, “Are you scared?” I was surprised he asked this as my family is not one who talks about emotions. I was so touched that tears welled up in my eyes. Luckily, I was wearing sunglasses. I mumbled a reply and continued driving toward our destination.
Of course, I am scared. I mean, I’m getting sliced open again and an entire organ is getting cut out of me. But I'm actually more sad. It’s not because I can no longer have kids, a fact that I’ve already accepted when I had the embolization procedure done. I’m sad because I miss my mom even more than usual.
When I had the myomectomy, my mom took six weeks off to take care of me in Seattle. She cooked and together, we ate, talked, watched Dancing with Stars, worked on my wedding invitations, shopped, laughed. We spent every waking minute together. It's one of my favorite memories of my mom. Having an invasive surgery again for the same thing reminds me of that precious time and how of much I miss my mom—her laughter, her stories, her love.
While my mom can’t be here physically, I know her spirit will be watching over me as I undergo surgery this Friday. Luckily, my sister and dad will be here. My sister will need to leave as soon as I get discharged, but my dad will continue to stay and take care of me until I’m back on my feet. Since it's going to be an abdominal hyterectomy because my uterus is 10x its normal size, the estimated recovery period is about six weeks.
It has been a long journey, but I’m somewhat relieved to be wrapping it up. I’ll be completely relieved when I’ve fully recovered and can enjoy life of not having to wear a pad every day, not worrying if I’ve bled through my clothes, not being anemic, not scheduling my social life around the heaviest time of my cycle, not being offered a seat on the bus because I looked pregnant.
Thank you to all my family and friends for the support, positive vibes and offerings of food during this difficult time. Your love and generosity are greatly appreciated!
8/11 Update: The surgery went well and my recovery is going smooth. The pathology report showed that my uterus weighed over 800 grams, compared to a normal one that weighs approximately 60 grams. This is a result of the 100+ fibroids, ranging from .3 to 5 cm in size. My doctor even commented, "I think that is the most I have ever seen!" Having the report confirmed the size of my fibroid-riddled uterus assures me that I made the right decision to undergo a hysterectomy. :)
I was bleeding to death, literally, when I was diagnosed with fibroids a decade ago. I was menstruating heavily and non-stop for weeks and became super anemic. When I saw the gynecologist about this, I was admitted immediately into the hospital to get iron pumped back into me daily for two weeks. As soon as my red blood cell count was back to normal, I underwent an abdominal myomectomy to remove these benign lumps. I have a nice five-inch scar along my bikini line as a souvenir.
Fibroids are common among women in their 30s and 40s, and they can’t even compare to cancer and other life-threatening diseases. Nevertheless, I hoped that would be the first and last time I’d deal with them, even though I knew the chances of them returning were high. Two years ago, they indeed came back and I opted for uterine fibroid embolization, a less invasive procedure to shrink and kill them altogether. Unfortunately, it wasn’t successful and I am where I am today.
When I told my dad about the hysterectomy, he asked, “Are you scared?” I was surprised he asked this as my family is not one who talks about emotions. I was so touched that tears welled up in my eyes. Luckily, I was wearing sunglasses. I mumbled a reply and continued driving toward our destination.
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| Mommy in LA (2009) |
When I had the myomectomy, my mom took six weeks off to take care of me in Seattle. She cooked and together, we ate, talked, watched Dancing with Stars, worked on my wedding invitations, shopped, laughed. We spent every waking minute together. It's one of my favorite memories of my mom. Having an invasive surgery again for the same thing reminds me of that precious time and how of much I miss my mom—her laughter, her stories, her love.
While my mom can’t be here physically, I know her spirit will be watching over me as I undergo surgery this Friday. Luckily, my sister and dad will be here. My sister will need to leave as soon as I get discharged, but my dad will continue to stay and take care of me until I’m back on my feet. Since it's going to be an abdominal hyterectomy because my uterus is 10x its normal size, the estimated recovery period is about six weeks.
It has been a long journey, but I’m somewhat relieved to be wrapping it up. I’ll be completely relieved when I’ve fully recovered and can enjoy life of not having to wear a pad every day, not worrying if I’ve bled through my clothes, not being anemic, not scheduling my social life around the heaviest time of my cycle, not being offered a seat on the bus because I looked pregnant.
Thank you to all my family and friends for the support, positive vibes and offerings of food during this difficult time. Your love and generosity are greatly appreciated!
8/11 Update: The surgery went well and my recovery is going smooth. The pathology report showed that my uterus weighed over 800 grams, compared to a normal one that weighs approximately 60 grams. This is a result of the 100+ fibroids, ranging from .3 to 5 cm in size. My doctor even commented, "I think that is the most I have ever seen!" Having the report confirmed the size of my fibroid-riddled uterus assures me that I made the right decision to undergo a hysterectomy. :)
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