Recalibrating

2014 was all about introspection.

Working out on a rainy day.

For the first half of last year, I made a conscious effort to remove myself from the hubbub and kept my social circle very small. Family and long-time friends can attest this is quite different than my usual extroverted self. But I felt I needed time to focus on myself, so I can continue to reflect, heal and re-prioritize.

During the social sabbatical, I picked up new solitary activities, such as sewing and working out. I even found true satisfaction in attending local events, traveling and dining out alone. It's quite empowering to know that I can enjoy my own company!

When my birthday came and went in early June, keeping a low profile became a comfortable habit. I continued working out, sewing and making very selective appearances. My cousin Linda commented that I was four cats short of becoming a cat lady. I wouldn't mind having more cats, but Lady may think differently though!

My cat Lady and I.

I basically created, and lived, in this small bubble, where I was in control of my time, experiences, and most importantly, my emotions. I was so protective of my vulnerability, I became emotionally disengaged and socially uninterested in things I would otherwise. For example, I wasn't nurturing existing relationships, as interactions with friends were minimal, limited to Facebook or non-existence. Nor taking advantage of opportunities, such as after-work happy hours, to develop genuine, and perhaps long-lasting, friendships with my coworkers.

When I was stuck at a traffic light one weekend prior to Christmas, however, I had an epiphany—removing myself from social engagements was actually counterproductive to the healing process and my personal growth because, by nature, I'm a social butterfly who feeds off of interpersonal connections. Furthermore, while I felt safe and comfortable in my current situation, I realized I wasn't truly happy, but merely content.

My holiday sewing project.

I shared this revelation with a couple of close friends, and they both responded in a similar way, "Being selective with your time is not necessary a bad thing. Perhaps it's a sign of maturity. Besides, life should be about balance." 

They couldn't be more correct. One, I really needed to experience the other end of the social spectrum to help re-calibrate myself. Two, I'm not twenty-something anymore, when I made quick-thinking decisions and spent more time out than in. And lastly, life is about balance.

With those insights, for 2015, I plan to continue spending a healthy amount of time pursuing solitary interests, and to try stepping out of this bubble from time to time to socialize more.

So, who's up for happy hour or for a game night in?

Love this game I received for Christmas!